Wednesday, August 1, 2012

You might be a little bit redneck if....

A few months ago, I got a roommate (who is engaged and I never see her). The first night she was here, I gave her a few "pointers" about our little house. 

  • "If the bathroom light doesn't work, just bang on the bedroom wall. If you hit the "sweet spot," it should come back on."
  • "Don't mind my flip flop in the bathroom and the hall. I use them to kill bugs. Turns out, it is difficult to kill some spiders with shampoo bottles. If you try, they might fall on you in the shower...."
At that moment, I could see the, "What have I gotten into look?" so I didn't tell her any more. However, here are a few thoughts that almost came out.

  • "Don't mind the scurrying you'll here in the roof. Now that I've seen the mice that get in our house, I don't think that they are massive rats, like I first though. I think they are squirrels. If you get lonely, you can play hide and seek. If you hit the right spot of the ceiling, you can hear them run. Actually, it's more like tag..." 
  • "You see that burnt stick by the stove. That's my s'more stick. You can use it to roast marshmallows over our stove if you want. Don't use a fork. It'll turn it black. Please don't throw it out, it's the best I could find."
  • "I like to keep the blinds down in the big window. Towards the end of summer the flies get slow, but somehow they make a hideout there. You can come home and play "whack-a-fly" with my flip flop. Don't worry, it's not just us. The missionaries (who live next door) said they get flies like this too." 
However, it wasn't until I 
took the following picture that I realized, I might be a little bit redneck....

The saddest part is, I'm not sure if I qualify, even as I write this post. However, I am thinking about opening a bug zoo in my house. How much do you think people would be willing to pay to see see a few big bugs and a zillion species of spider?